We need the Super Mario back on our screens. Who else delivers porn in such an awe inspiring manner? From his great sense of humour to the insane stuff he does on film.

His website, UK Road Trips, is rated as one of the best in the world and is highly popular with pretty much everybody. I hear even the Pope himself is a member.

We have written to Jimmy Saville but we hear he is only fixing it for young ladies.

Like James Bond, nobody does it better!

Please sign the petition below which we will send off to every porn production company and adult TV company with a view to bringing Super Marino back to the screens!